Do you believe you can have it all?

I John Rogers, am a Father, a husband, a musician, a lyricists, a business consultant, a fisherman, a skater, a snowboarder, a life coach, an eccentric, a practitioner of SyncCreation, a leader, a follower, and a friend.

While I define myself as these things I am also me with out them. However, right now in this moment I acknowledge all of these things as parts of my life that I choose to nurture, give energy and create with.

Each of these things takes time and energy. Some of these things create time and energy.  All of these things I choose to do… All of them!

I have a belief that I would like to share with you. I believe that I can have it all!

I believe that I can have two kids and still go on vacations. I believe that I can work for someone else and still have my own business. I believe that I can have a 5 year child from a different woman then my wife and still have a peaceful family were all members come together to create love for that child. I believe I can make a difference and be spiritually connected and still party like it is 1999. I believe I can be left brain and right brained at the same time, physical and spiritual, expansive and centered.

Many times this belief has been challenged. Many times, this belief has even caused me stress, lack of sleep and even war with those who do not believe this.

In a world with premade, mass produced, belief boxes for those of us who want to use them. I understand that this believe is contradictory to many. I understand that many believe one can not drink and be responsible, even spiritual. I understand that many believe one can not travel with little kids.

I acknowledge those beliefs. I appreciate the people who choose those beliefs. When I have chosen those beliefs in the past it has seemed easier and simpler.  I how ever choose not to give up something for something else.

Here are some evidence/beliefs that I subscribe to that support my belief that I can have it all. That the universe is abundant and ever expanding, that I am the co-creator of my universe, that where there is a will there is a way, that I attract what I put out and that there are others who belief they can have it all and are willing to support that belief.

Once again, I appreciate the people who choose to believe that they only have so many options and choices due to time, money, family, social status, etc. and if you are one of those people, bravo! You probably sleep better at night!

However, I invite you to; never make the thing you choose, feel like it is the reason you didn’t have all of what you want!!! Never let your kids feel like the reason you didn’t travel and gave up your hobbies, was because you had to be a dad. Never let your work feel like the reason you never started your own business was because you were stuck at your job.  Never let time feel like the reason you didn’t become a musician, actor or artist was because there wasn’t enough time to do both.

If you CHOOSE to spend your focus on the 3 most important things out of the 10 things you want to do, do it with pride. Let them know that you did it because you wanted to immerse yourself into the things you choose to care about most!

For those of you, who like me, choose to believe that we can have it all. Remember to be patient with yourself. You aren’t reaching for a star, your reaching for the stars. Remember to be resilient and that failures are steps to success. Remember to enjoy the journey. Remember to take care of yourself, physically, spiritually and mentally. In this journey you must learn and become refined in both body and soul so that you are able to hold “it all”.

And most of all, remember that there are others out there like you. People who are willing, who are enjoying the journey, attaining their dreams and having it all!

Sweat Lodge and Grandpa – Part 2

Today, Friday the 13^th, 2 days after the sweat lodge. I did not write this yesterday (or post this until today) as I was letting the experience sink in as I reflected upon it. Today, the day of my Grandfathers viewing, I am ready to write. Before I poor my heart out about one of the most powerful experiences of healing I have ever had I must share something with you.

I have many people ask me why I write. Especially, why do I write such vulnerable personal feelings and thoughts and put them out so others can see them? I will go into this in much greater depth in a future article but I wanted to touch on it briefly here.

I John C Rogers believe in living life on the out side. I believe in the beauty of a world with out secrets, a world where each person openly shares their joy, pain, love, and passion so that all might see, gain strength, learn and be inspired from one another. I believe this so much that I have often found myself baring my soul to complete strangers. I believe this so much that I share this moment with you.

Wednesday night at 6 pm 5 members of the Campbell clan and 2 adopted members (my dad and My Brother in-law) showed up with an open and trusting heart. We had all been asked to come with an intention for the evening. Mine was, as I said in my previous article, to let go physically of my grandfather and to forge a bond with him spiritually.

I went into the start of the event with a belief that my clan was going to be a mess of tears and wailing from the pain of losing our grandfather. I would like to share with you my experience of what happened that night. I will respect the experience of the others that were there, as well as the ancient ritual, by sharing my experience only.  I am going to share it in the form of a letter to the men in attendance and extend the message to all of Grandfathers’ family.

Brothers, Campbell’s, clansmen, I come before you humbled and in gratitude for you. During that night as I was given the opportunity to connect and reflect I found myself in complete awe of you.

During the moment when I was invited to reflect on the masculine I took pause and reflected on Grandpa and the physical things I will miss; his smile, his solid hug, his toothpicks, him walking around trying to get us to eat more food, the way he told powerful stories and made them seem like the great events were done with ease, they way he spoke with certainty and more.

I shed some tears as I acknowledge such a powerful physical being as Grandfather. As I felt deeper into the moment and Grandpa’s strength I found myself noticing and feeling the souls of each of you there with me.  Here I was surrounded by some of the noblest of men I have ever met. My tears became tears of gratitude for Grandpa and for you.

Later that night as we were given the opportunity to connect with our ancestry, I felt grandpa so strong that I could see him kneeling down in front of me looking at me with wisdom and love in his eyes. I had the thought I should be crying. This was the time I thought all of my family would emotionally lose it. But I was not crying.

Instead I found myself yearning to speak to grandpa. I thanked him for the lessons he taught me, I told him I was going to miss him and I promised him I would carry him in my heart for ever. Upon whispering that, I stopped and my mind started to analyze what it would look like to carry him in my heart forever. I had the fear come up that I might forget, that I might forget how he looked, how he spoke, what his message was.

As I started to analyze deeper, my heart jumped back on line and I once again noticed grandpa. He leaned over to me and put his hand on my shoulder and I could feel the gratitude in his heart for me. I could feel the gratitude in his heart for the other men there. And amongst my fears of forgetting him he said “John you don’t ever have to forget, if you ever want to remember look at your brothers, look at your cousins, look in the mirror”.

At that moment I realized that Grandpa had stood so tall that he had inspired us all to walk in his foot steps. That we his children and grandchildren, are living examples of grandpa and his messages. Each of us in our own way carrying on a part of this great man.

Instantly I saw a flash of each of the members of his clan, OF OUR CLAN and I saw them through grandpa’s eyes.

Phillip, with your heart the size of the universe and beautiful tenderness.

Josh, your thrust for knowledge and the courage like that of a commander and leader of men.

Adam, with your strength and certainty in God and acceptance that is so strong you are willing to stand as a bridge from your religion to the world.

Casey, your absolute loyalty and love. A man who even with the world on his shoulders can inspire others to feel peace and at home.

Grant, your open acceptance and willingness to be a support for others, even a complete stranger.

Ryan, the nobility that can lead a kingdom by example and heart alone even in the toughest moments.

And I saw the rest of grandfather’s posterity there with us that night and I felt a pride and honor that I will never forget as grandfather once again whispered “you will remember”.

In that moment I became aware of the calmness around me; instead of the sobs of loss I felt a sea of love. I found the peace and strength to carry on knowing I will always have grandpa in my heart and more so then ever in my life I felt proud to belong to a heritage of honor, love, and leaders. Who each in their own way carry on Grandfathers message.

I stand here as a witness to each of your greatness and the greatness of our grandfather and heritage. If you ever feel alone, if you ever start to think that you don’t remember just look around… and remember. I love you all and I love you grandpa!